For many cultures, birth is a portal between two worlds. This portal opens 40 days before birth. The birth itself is an open space, the body and the soul are fully open and it is said that during labor the Mother’s spirit travels through a labyrinth into the universe to find and collect her baby’s soul. The Mother must leave this labyrinth again and come back fully into this world so that her and her baby’s energy doesn’t escape into the other world. That’s why it is so important to take care of yourself and let others care for you, rest, and not let negative energy enter your body for 40 days after birth. The way how you spend those 40 days, how much strength you regain, and how much you reconnect to your body, will affect the rest of your life. That’s why the postpartum period is sacred in all cultures. Traditionally, on the 40th day postpartum, the Bones closing ceremony was performed to call the spirit back to the body and close the portal. Giving birth to a child is an initiation and the Ceremony closes this process of transformation of a Woman into a Mother.
The ceremony has been used all over the world to aid in the new mothers’ healing process with the purpose of closing cycles, and energetic fields and returning heat to the body. It helps to realign the bones and muscles, it helps the pelvic organs shift and the uterus to shrink back down and it stimulates blood flow.
Nevertheless, the Ceremony can be performed even many years after birth with the same amazing results because it helps you to close the old and open yourself to the new. It is deeply healing after the loss of a baby, abortion, unsuccessful IVF, hysterectomy, or fertility problems. It can be done at any point in life, even with people who haven’t given birth but wish to close something else in their lives. This ceremony is not exclusive to birthing mothers, parents, or women. The Bone closing ceremony is for anyone who is going through or went through a traumatic or life-changing experience such as marriage, divorce, separation, loss of job, death of a close person, moving homes, going into menopause, overcoming an illness or healing from a significant injury, etc.
Nowadays many women (and men) enjoy the Closing the Bones ceremony as a treat, as a spa day, because it is truly a very enjoyable time. Honoring you, your body, and your soul, just as you are in the present moment. It is a celebration of your achievements, of your transformation, of your inner Goddess. Giving birth is a special and unique moment in every woman’s life and it deserves the celebration, the acceptance, the honoring, the nurturing, the acknowledgment.
Nowadays many women (and men) enjoy the Closing the Bones ceremony as a treat, as a spa day, because it is truly a very enjoyable time. Honoring you, your body, and your soul, just as you are in the present moment. It is a celebration of your achievements, of your transformation, of your inner Goddess. Giving birth is a special and unique moment in every woman’s life and it deserves the celebration, the acceptance, the honoring, the nurturing, the acknowledgment.
During the ceremony, you will be given time to process everything you are feeling and thinking so you can heal emotionally and regain strength. It helps you find closure to your birth story, get centered again, and connect with your new body so that you can have confidence as a Woman and Mother. During this time you will feel nurtured and at peace so you can release emotions associated with the birth and motherhood.
The whole ceremony takes 6-10 hours (if you breastfeed, the person who will look after your baby can come at any time when your baby needs a feed) and it includes sharing your story with the help of Mama Cacao, gentle touch massage with or without essential oils, ceremonial bath or vaginal steaming with herbs, and finally wrapping your body in 7 scarves so that you can be born into your new reality. Then we will close the ceremony.
First, we will prepare the space and the Cacao. You can choose any herbs and spices you like and make it the best possible. We will drink your Cacao during sharing and the whole process if you want. The drink helps to bring energy and heat into the body, it opens your heart. You decide what it is that you would like to close. Then we can talk about it, I will guide you through your story so that you can recollect all the important pieces of this experience that make you the person you are and who you want to be. You will be able to share your story without any judgment, in full acceptance, you can tell me everything that you need to say out loud and you perhaps never could before.
The purpose of the gentle touch massage is to honor your body and give it thanks for what it went through. This type of massage gently brings the body, mind, and soul back together. Therefore it seals what was opened during the birthing process. You will again choose the essential oils yourself, so their power can provide you with exactly what you need right now. The massage helps with the blood flow, it also aids in healing the uterus if performed just after postpartum.
The bath or vaginal steaming will release any tension that you still might have in your body. It is very cleansing. In the water or the steam, you can release anything that you don’t need anymore, any worries, fears, emotions, feelings, memories, or anything that is too heavy for you to carry further. You will choose the herbs that we will use in this stage, all of them are safe for pregnant women and babies, and all of them have very nurturing and healing abilities. After the bath or steaming you will get dressed in a new dress that represents your new self.
Being wrapped like a chrysalis in the scarves is a powerful and magical experience. You can stay there for as long as you like, I will be with you and will wait for the moment when you know the process is finished. Then I will unwrap you, a beautiful butterfly, and we will end the ceremony together.
Practical information if you choose me as your guide:
The processes that have been started in the ceremony can continue during the next couple of days or weeks. You should definitely rest at least the next day, so make sure you don’t have any errands to run or work to do. Be kind to yourself. You have given yourself a great gift and it is up to you how you use it. You will not be able to drive after the ceremony, so make sure to make arrangements so that someone can pick you up or you can stay for the night. I perform the ceremony on women only. The ceremony can happen in your house (if you’re outside of Canterbury you will also pay for travel expenses) or you can use a space provided in Christchurch (you will have to pay for the space). The price also includes a Zoom or a phone call before the ceremony and 3 weeks after the ceremony to see if the process is over.